I usually fly by, potentially faster than time itself. As I started expecting #2 I tried to go into lower gear and let some things drop. I don't make it to the office at 7 sharp, I do no start up work, I recognise my brain can not process charity accounts every night, I dont tender to C's every cry at night. I thought I was doing pretty well.
As time went by I realized how tired I was and how my body was refusing to fly. It started to wear me down, how much I was uncapable of doing. In time I accepted age and everything else would not let me fly by pregnancy the same way as before. And I just had to accept it.
I was getting there, in the middle of agreeing a house move at 7.5 months pregnancy. And then I was left out of boss. I only have 10 pct more work but I have 200 pct more pressure and lack an un-measurable amount of support. And I am going away in 2 months. And I can feel the baby going against my sitting on the computer position multiple times a day. I am struggling again, but again I accept I can not do more. It kills me but I also know this new awareness rejuvenates me. It is part of me. A new vision that allows me to see limitations as a natural element rather than a painful flaw.
I am still dealing with the body limitations and learning how not to let them bring me down, especially as they are often unpredictable or sudden. But I feel like with small steps, i could even take a few assisted flights.
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