Sometimes I feel like I am losing it. I just can't do all the things around me that need to get done, the move and stuff for the new house, the coming back to London, the reunions with old friends, the training, the studying and most of all the NGO things accumulate and I just seem not to be able to cope. I sleep worse every day, I am more tired when I woke up, tonight I even dreamt of FSA regulation. And my to do list keeps growing and I am the bottleneck in so many things. In fact, I am almost not being able to run a to do list anymore. Some days it is hard to see the light in the end of the tunnel, or shall I say the crosses all over the to do list. I don't know where to start, I have troubles prioritizing and I don't see how it can get better. We are too few for what we are doing and I am afraid sometimes it can all fall apart. I just had to let it out, I can't always keep the spirits up...
I heard what is likely to become one of my top 3 favourite quotes on a podcast on Friday. "Time is the only real democratic asset. We are all awarded the same time, it is what we do with it that distinguishes us". Now, I recognise that most of us need to work with survive and that is not democratic throughout. But on an equal opportunity basis, this is an interesting way of putting it. For many years I did not understand why MS thought my resume was so interesting. In fact, they chased me during the entire recruitment process, even though I had no idea of moving to London or Finance. I wanted to be a consultant and stay in Lisbon forever. But traditional consultants in Portugal saw nothing in me, and MS did not let me go. When I started screening resumes and hiring people a couple of years later is when I understood why I was different. TIME. I was truly different about what I did with my time. Not necessarily the basics - choice of degree or anything. But really ...
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