Skip to main content

Fear

As I sit in the tube, someone sings next to me in what sounds like arabic. It could not be, but looks like it. Echoing chants in a compenetrated fashion. You can see the surprise in some people's faces when they see someone humming on the train. But as they hear the type of humming, there is a slight cloud of fear that is hard to control. As I look around me I can't help but think many are thinking what he will do next. Reading the lyrics from his phone,that only I can see, as I sit next to him, this image is hard to ignore. The white big male in front of me is markedly checking for movements. I try to focus on my game and leave him in peace. Deep inside, I can't ignore it.
And it is so unfair we feel like this. I focus on T and all the amazing arabs I know. How this could be a love song that he likes or his practicing or enjoys. How this could be his most efficient way to do his morning prayers. How this could not even be arabic for all I know. But what about all the people around me that have never seen anything other than the wars? How can they deal with the fear of his next move.
The status of the world has brought us this. Not some movie scene, but real life scenes where everyone seems to find religion as a good excuse for killings. It is very discomforting.
And by the way, he was just another guy in the tube. He stood up and left in Canada Water. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Time is what makes us different

I heard what is likely to become one of my top 3 favourite quotes on a podcast on Friday. "Time is the only real democratic asset. We are all awarded the same time, it is what we do with it that distinguishes us".  Now, I recognise that most of us need to work with survive and that is not democratic throughout. But on an equal opportunity basis, this is an interesting way of putting it. For many years I did not understand why MS thought my resume was so interesting. In fact, they chased me during the entire recruitment process, even though I had no idea of moving to London or Finance. I wanted to be a consultant and stay in Lisbon forever. But traditional consultants in Portugal saw nothing in me, and MS did not let me go. When I started screening resumes and hiring people a couple of years later is when I understood why I was different. TIME.  I was truly different about what I did with my time. Not necessarily the basics - choice of degree or anything. But really ...
1 comment
Read more

We are not afraid.. are we not?

I see signs saying we are not afraid. Londoners are tough and endured the bombings of WWII. But those Londoners are hardly the same as the ones here today. Yes people in general are resilient, more than we think we can be when looking outside out. That is anywhere in the world, not just in London. And truth be said there is merit in not letting fear control our lives and terrorism win.  Well I just walked into the district line, 5 stations away from Parsons Green and I am afraid. I am not shaking, crying or running away. But I am afraid mostly because it is all so natural. Life must go on I said, as I decided I was not going to cancel my lunch and avoid the tube. But that is what makes it scary. Life goes on and in an effort to not be afraid we recklessly do not change our habits and rely on the stats that more people die on the road then on terrorist attacks. Reality is, the law of probability does not matter because terrorist events are binary.  So I think about my frie...
1 comment
Read more

Wonderful day

What a wonderful day. I am grateful for this newly found ability to enjoy my surroundings. As this was the second weekend in a roll that we were in Lisbon, the should word was quieter than usual and B triggered the crazy thought. Let's just stay home and do nothing! Wow - can we do that, are we allowed? More than allowed, we do that in London all the time and it is possibly one of my few fears if I ever move here - the inability to do what we want over what others want.  We gave it a go and i indulged into cooking us a proper lunch. As we sat  to do nothing after lunch I commented 'what a luxury'. I truly was not familiar with the concept. And even better family came to visit so we had the combination of both worlds. I ended a day with a friend over for dinner over a bottle of wine. I am grateful for all the little moments that filled my day. I am grateful I did so many things I love in a single day, without even expecting. Thank you.
Post a Comment
Read more